In a story that I can only describe as the very least of my worries, it turns out the scions of the rich are no longer able to count on their parents for stipends, pilates lessons and advanced physics tutoring. The end is really near!
For those of you who are way to lazy to read an entire article by the New York Times, fuck you. But even so, I will quote some of the best hear for you right now…
“Jodi Hamilton began her senior year of high school in Woodcliff Lake, N.J., this fall on the usual prosperous footing. Her parents were providing a weekly allowance of $100 and paying for private Pilates classes, as well as a physics tutor who reported once a week to their 4,000-square-foot home.”
Indeed, life was a constant struggle to live off of 100 dollars a week. I can only imagine trying to scrimp as a high school senior– but after greedy corporate financiers scraped the pumpkin guts out of our rotten jack-o-lantern of an economy, the Hamiltons had to find way to scrape by …
“Pilates was dropped, along with takeout sushi dinners, and Jodi’s allowance, which covers lunch during the week, slipped to $60. Instead of having a tutor, Jodi has become a tutor, earning $150 a week through that and baby-sitting.”
OH NOES!!!! What will she do now? Her life is over I suppose.
And to top it all off, we have a veritable master in supply and demand tell us something that even the most brain-dead neuron-shitting paste-eater could have told us …
“Research shows that the bigger allowance you get from mom and dad,” explained Andrew M. Sum, director of Northeastern’s center, “the less likely you are to work.”
Awesome!
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